What kind of
tree does a math teacher climb? Geometry
!

What do you
have to know to get top grades in geometry ? All
the angles !

What kind of
pliers do you use in arithmetic? Multipliers
!

If you had
one dollar and you asked your father for another, how many dollars would you have?
One
dollar.
You don't know your arithmetic. You
don't know my father !

Jackie stood
quietly as her father examined her report card. "What
is this 45 in math?" asked her father. "I
think that's the size of the class," she said quickly!

If I had five
coconuts and I gave you three, how many would I have left ? I
don't know.
Why not ? In
our school we do all our arithmetic in apples and oranges.

If I had seven
oranges in one hand and eight oranges in the other, what would I have ? Big
hands !

The teacher
was giving her pupils a quiz on counting. Jackie got things started by counting
from 1 to 10. "Now, Fred," said the teacher, "you take over, beginning
with 11." "11,
14, 23, 42, 26," said Fred. "What
kind of counting is that'?" asked the teacher "Who's
counting'?" replied Fred. "I'm calling signals."

If you got
$10 from 10 people, what would you have ? A
new bike !

Why was the
maths book unhappy It
had too many problems !

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