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Teacher : Why are you so late ?
Pupil : Well, I was obeying the sign that says "School ahead go slow !"
Teacher : Smith, Didn't you hear me call you ?
Smith : Yes, sir, but you told us not to answer back !

Teacher : When do you like school most ?
Pupil : When it's closed !

Teacher : Billy, please don't whistle while studying.
Billy : Oh, but I'm not studying - just whistling !

Teacher : Billy, I hope I didn't see you copying from David's work
Billy : I hope you didn't too !

Teacher : Give me a sentence with the words defence, defeat and detail in it.
Pupil : When a horse jumps over defence, defeat go before detail !
Teacher : If I had ten flies on my desk and I swatted one, how many would I have left ?
Pupil : One, the others would have flown away !
Teacher : If you had five apples on your desk and the boy next to you took three what would you have ?
Pupil : A fight !
Pupil: I don't think I deserved the 0% you gave me for that test.
Teacher: Neither do I but its the lowest I could give !
Teacher : What is a comet ?
Pupil : A star with a tail
Teacher: Can you name one ?
Pupil: Lassie !
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